A Writer's Thoughts: The End Must Always Remain Out of Sight

The End 

must always remain out of sight,

 when writing a story.

One may have ideas about it, but must never force it upon the story.

Because the story may not want such an end. A story, in fact, will always turn out otherwise. It will always be different from what you expect,

from what you see in your head.

You are not able to make everything in you have planned out in your head part of the story.

When you write, you revise the idea, the scene or the dialogue, again and you try something else, for that might be a better beginning or a much better development.

But in here lies also danger.

For if you change too much and too many times, the idea, the scene or the dialogue loses its beauty, its authenticity. Too much force will break the puzzle piece so that it can't fit at all.

And gone is the brilliant idea. Enter has the anger, the frustration, the insecurity.

The unwillingness to write.

And that is what we writers do not desire. We fear that unwillingness.

So much that we force ourselves to write when the unwillingness tries to take over.

We write down meaningless words, hoping that it'll turn into something good.

We write fearfullly.

Sometimes it works and we overcome this unwillingness.

Other times, most times it does not, for it wasn't the right time to write.

We writers need our time to rest; we mustn't be writing all the time.

In the end we're human beings and no human can do anything eternally. We need variation, to be busy with something else from time to time.

We writers can't write forever. It's a fact we must accept.

The end must always remain out of sight.

The story will end on its own.

We writers must enjoy the journey as long as it lasts and accept its fate.

We writers must simply write until we can do no more.

We writers must always try to write again and be prepared for the end to come.

The End of this blog post is in sight.

On the next page we'll meet. Where I start to write again until I can do no more; again and again until the end is there...

I hope you enjoyed today's blog post. :)

Giggles in Grown up clothing

The first thing I see when I walk down the stairs are the variaty of legs.
Yes, legs; legs as long as mine, as covered in cloth and legs as bare as theirs, a little piece of black on the top or with many holes in the covering cloth which is always branded with "Hollister" or something like that. And how dark it is up there, above those legs. I mean, yes,
they have long legs, beautiful and healthy ones, able to lift the upperbody high up in the sky. But not beyond the atmosphere, right?
I get a bit closer to them and ah, I see now! It's the smoke. Very thick, too - all their pretty faces that took them ages to bring to perfection this morning are almost entirely hidden!
Well, it is more about the bombs anyway - the faces are, hm, what should I say? The battle cry? Or more like an admirable painting? Or a sausage, perhaps, looking very, very and I mean very tasty - If you know what I mean, guys. *wink* *wink*
It's hard to tell, since their munition is the same, the same bombs are thrown, used in the same way. It's a never ending cycle of bomb throwing. hard to get through, or more like - I'm unwilling to get through. Other outsiders, like to watch, though.
But if we could just see inside the sausage and the sausage-making, then we'd probably know whether it was battle cry or not.
Ironically, they hate using bombs or more like, they're scared that the bombs might explode in their hands and not in someone else's so that they can claim victory and laugh, but at the same time they need the bomb throwing to feel alive.
*Cough* *Cough* This smoke is suffocating! God, how do they keep this up?!
Then I see that the smoke which seems thick enough to make them invisible for each other, isn't as thick for outsiders.
They're giggling while throwing their bombs, but their not keeping up.
They're pretending to. Desperately.
We might find it annoying, but they are dying. And it's their own fault.

I don't understand and I shake my head.
I continue walking down the stairs and then through the hallway. It's a bright, colorful path I walk and I barely recognize the darkness and giggles from above anymore.
For the brightness of my own path and the rainbows above, the giggling of pixies and animals and the people from fantasyland are filling my head.
Whether their giggles are better than the giggles in grown up clothing, I do not know.
But I do think they're nicer to listen to. Although I'm the only one who hears them.


Hehehe, o, you cute dog...O MY GOD A PANDA... NO NO NO - I DON'T WANNA FLYYY-AAHHH--
Erhem. Sorry. As you can see, I totally can't relate to the "I" in this story. Erhem. Nope. Not at all.
... 
See you on the next page.
...

[PIC ORIGIN: fullhdwall.com]

Time For A Change

HOLY FUDGEBALLS!
Something's really different here...
Could it be that I changed the font or something?

(...)
Badum tsch.
Ha ha. Very funny, Nadi.

No, but seriously - I've really changed a lot of this blog. The background, description, social media, colours, the font - it's all completely different than a few weeks ago.
And the reason for it was and is still very simple - I wanted a change.

You see, for a year - or a bit more than a year, to be precise - I've been blogging about books. Reading and reviewing them or sharing my thoughts on a sequel in some series I just got into. It was really fun and helped me to get in touch with the whole bookish community and I could explore a different side of writing and the books I read sometimes inspired me for my own stories which I would sometimes post here on the blog; it was perfect for a bookworm like me who loved to write.
Until it wasn't.

I'm not planning to give you a thorough and dramatical explanation as to why I don't like blogging about books anymore. I'm not going to tell you that it's because of my o so busy and unpredictable life. I'm not going to tell you that I hate books and that I'd rather see them burned to the ground rather than in my bookcase. I'm not going to tell you that I've been traumatized for life because of certain books and I don't think I can read a single book ever again.
Because really, those aren't even true nor make too much sense.
So what went wrong? What is my reason?
Nothing, really. I just changed. I just didn't feel like blogging about books anymore, because I just like reading them. And only reading them.
Aaannddd I've always liked something else MUCH more: writing stories myself.

So that is exactly what I will be doing on this blog from now on.
I'm going to write.
I'm going to write the biggest book EVER.

Every once in two weeks in this world consisting of words, words will do many things with you - each time something different. Sometimes they'll pull you in through a black hole forcefully, sometimes kindly. Other times they'll flash before you and before you know it, you aren't home behind your computer or on your phone anymore. At other time they're very sneaky and make it seem that nothing's wrong, but as soon as you blink once, twice, the pretence they put up wavers and you can see the most extraordinary things they've hidden.
Every once in TWO weeks a page is turned in this book, Written By Nadi.

Hihi. I hope you're just as excited as I am! I can't wait to see how thick this book is going to get and I hope you'll stick with me till the very last page.

Oh, and if you'd like, you can also send me requests on what type of story I should write (or simply for feedback, of course!). Mind, though, that I won't fulfill the request immediately - that can take some time!

See you on the next page. Bye! :)

A Torch Against The Night!

We're already halfway through June, soon we'll be in July and then in August. 
And at the end of that month something pretty awesome will happen.
...
A TORCH AGAINST THE NIGHT, THE SEQUEL TO AN EMBER IN THE ASHES WILL BE RELEASED!
Specially for that I've been rereading the book and today I'll share my rambling thoughts and predictions on how this book may turn out...

The Future of the Empire

Map of the Empire
Source: tor.com

I suppose this is the most obvious question to ask - what will happen to the Empire now?

That Snake, Marcus Farrar, is the Emperor now and has Helene, the new Blood Shrike, at his mercy. That won't do any good for the Empire.

In fact, under the reign of Marcus, terror only awaits. And rapes. Lots of rapes and whores. With a Helene watching with gritting teeth, probably forced to become his whore as well. I shiver as I'm writing this and I really, really hope she'll get raped by him. Nope, I don't want to believe that.

Puppies, unicorns and rainbows...

Anyway - that's not the only threat to the Empire. I feel like the Resistance won't do much good either, with their stupid leader who's called Mazen. The asshole.

Betraying Laia, betraying his own fighters. Ugh. Blegh. Raarrgh. Ugh.

He's so focused on fighting the Martials and "saving the Scholars" that he would lie and cheat to do it.  I can understand, though, he's simply desperate - if he waits too long and doesn't take the chances he can get, doesn't eliminate to blocks in his way, he won't get there. But is it worth the cost? Is it worth his humanity?

Won't he be just the same as the Martials then?

I do think that we won't get to see a lot of what's happening in the Empire. It'll probably serve as the background to our story, the world through which our protagonists have to wander but will not affect them too much. They'll be too focused on getting to Kauf.

To Darin.

Darin and Kauf - YIKES!

DARINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!

The whole reason why Laia got into all of this, this mess, this torture; the reason why she stepped out of her comfort-zone and became as strong and courageous as - well, she tries - the Lioness herself. Will it be worth it?

And even if he's alive, how alive will he be? It gives me the shivers.

Other than that - I do hope that if Darin will be saved, it'll happen quickly, because I really want to feel the brother-sister-reunion feels and I really REALLY want to see the look on his face when he hears about Mazen - tsk - and what he's done to his little sister. And of course, I hope he doesn't freak out when Elias is with her. And I want to see the look on his face when he hears about the love triangle, hehe. O, that's going to be fun.

In Ember, Darin is painted as one who is willing to do everything he can to save his people, the Scholars, to get them to fight. I think that this part of him will become important to the story and will drag Laia and Elias into a big revolution, against the Empire, against the Resistance, for the Scholars. Laia will most likely follow her brother into this revolution - she's been fighting for him for so long, she won't back off now.

Elias - I'm not too sure. All he wanted was freedom, now that he's got it and repaid his debt to Laia, there's nothing that will stop him. He was never interested in this Empero-crap or the Empire - he wanted to be free of it. Besides he'll probably be worrying about Helene a lot, too - he won't want to fight as much as to save her. Perhaps he'll do that instead of joining Laia and her brother?

Or maybe it's his guilt that won't allow him to join them - he has been a Mask for so long; the Scholars won't accept him even if he manages to save them.. Maybe he thinks it's better to just stay away from all of it.

Or maybe I'm wrong altogether and there won't be any kind of revolution. I doubt this even when I'm writing this, but hey - maybe other cool stuff will happen?

Something with the jinns and ghuls?

Jinns, Ghuls and other mystical creatures

Yeah, what about our magical creatures?

How important will they become?

Will they eventually become so powerful and our enemies?

Or - ooh, I'm getting pumped at the thought of it - will they aid the most-likely-to-happen-revolution Darin will probably start? Or - even better - maybe Darin was already in league with them, with a few of them at least... Maybe they've saved him before Laia and Elias could and these two then stumble on a portal in the middle of nowhere, end up in this weird, surreal tunnel lit by glowing crystals and with curious, tiny and shiny bugs that fly through the air. When they reach the end of the tunnel, they find a door and end up in this massive throneroom. And Laia gasps because in the majestic throne, which seems the be made out of dark branches Darin sits with a crown on his head.

It's unlikely, I know, since the ghuls and all hate the Scholars and have sided with the Martials against them, but it'd be pretty darn cool, don't you think?

But either way, I do hope that Tahir won't let them remain as our enemies in book two - I think it'd be cooler if they end up being kind of good.

Elaia or Kaia or Helias?

Okay, I'm terrible at making shipnames, but then - who will be shipped in this book?!

I don't even know who I want to be shipped with who!

I mean, Keenan is this hot, rough rebel who really likes Laia, loves her even, and has given up his position at the Resistance for her, but then we also have Elias who we know better and who has a kind soul - and is HOT too - , so kind that he doesn't even think about killing Laia when he could have, maybe should have and could have gotten his freedom.

But their kiss - it seemed to me that they were just desperate, desperate to feel free for just a minute. Laia even notes how he seemed to scream Let me forget Let me forget Let me forget - there's no actual love behind it.

But what if that love will come in this book? Because Elias already mentioned a few times after the kiss how he can't stop thinking about her body against him and all... (*wink* *wink*)

And we also have Helene who has been in love with Elias since forever, and she shares such a close bond with him. She knows him like she knows no other. The same can be said for Elias, but we also know that when Tristas told him about Helene's feelings for him he said he couldn't, he couldn't love her that way. Although he said that, his thoughts do slip to seeing her that way, even before he said that - will Tahir do something with these feelings?  It may not be the strongest argument for Helias, but I won't say it's impossible.

Personally, I don't really know where I'm standing, although I do feel that Helias probably won't be my OTP - they are just BFF- material to me, honestly. But who knows - maybe Tahir can make it work. If she'll make it work.

WHAT WILL SHE DO?

Helene

A Tumblr meme of Helene
Source: penguinteen.com

So I found this out just recently, but...
HELENE GETS TO SAY STUFF IN TORCH!
I'm really excited to see what we'll learn from Helene's perspective. We all know that she's one to always follow the rules, but after being named Blood Shrike of Marcus, I don't think she'd like to do that so much anymore.
Especially her love for Elias might be in the way of that - what will Elias think of her if she'd mercilessly would go kill innocent people just because the new Emperor says so?
I'm pretty sure she will come back to Elias and join him, eventually, in whatever he's going to do. 
But first we'll probably get to see how the Empire will change and where she stands in all of the chaos.
But other than that - I really have no clue how crazy this book is going to be when we get to see Helene's perspective too!
IT MAKES ME SO EXCITED YAAAYYYY!

Well, that's all I got to say for now. I am curious to find out which of my predictions are right! I guess we all will have to wait till the 30th of August!

Until the next blog post, then! :)

Exciting Book Releases in 2016!

You know what's so great about the New Year?

The books you've been waiting for for ages finally come out! GOD, I'VE WAITED SO LONG!!!

But you also discover that for some books (*cough* A Torch Against The Night *cough*) you might have to wait even longer than you want too... But either way - it's full of new books for me, uh, I mean all of us readers, to take...

*rubbing her hands together and laughing an evil laugh*

And today I'm going to share you some new book releases I'm really really really but like really excited about!

First up: Glass Sword by Victoria Aveyard.

I've written a blog post about my thoughts on the sequel to Red Queen before, so click here if you want to check that out. But O MY GOD - I'M SO FREAKIN' EXCITED!!!!

Red Queen left me broken into twinty billion pieces and I just... I can't... God, I feel like... Red Queen was such a great book; the magic, the world, the FREAKIN' UNEXPECTED MINDBLOWING HEARTBREAKING DEADLY (YES DEADLY) PLOT TWIST and that endinggggggggg! It was such a fun and awesome reading experience and I'm just going to say it again; the plotline was sooo great! I just really hope that Glass Sword will be just as great or even greater.

And I've heard so many great things on the sequel from people with ARC's of Glass Sword! THEY SAY THERE WILL BE ANOTHER PLOT TWIST! THEY SAY IT'S WORTH THE WAIT!

It just makes the wait more painful... Ugh.

This book comes out February 9th!

And of course, A Torch Against The Night must be included in this list!

The first book, An Ember In The Ashes, was another great book. Although I didn't find the plot particularly mindblowing, the characters in this book were so colorful and well worked out that this book became a really great read. And I might've loved it a lot too, because it was my first hardcover and it had a map included. Hehe.

But here too; the world Tahir created, which was inspired on the Roman Empire, was beautiful and interesting!

The book itself was really well written and I'm just so so so curious about what will happen in the sequel. WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN BETWEEN ELIAS AND LAIA? GOD PLEASE TELL ME!!!

Well, I guess I have to wait till the 30th of August, till I can find out. *sigh*

I haven't read any books of this series yet, but I'm going to, I swear I'm really going to, but I'm thrilled for the third book in the Half Bad-series by Sally Green - Half Lost!

My bookish friend made me read fanfiction on Half Bad and told me so many awesome things about it, so I'm going to have to read it, don't I?

I can't tell you much about this series, but what I do know is that the first book is about a boy called Nathan who is half a white witch and half a black witch and he's stuck in cage and he's going to escape out of a cage. And he's in love with a girl called Alice. And there's this really really really sweet and loyal guy called Gabriel who's in love with Nathan and Nathan is aware of that, but he's in love with Alice, but kinda also with Gabriel, I think, and it's just so unfair, but I don't have any idea what's actually going on, so yeah...

I'm going to have to read it either way, though.

This book will be out the 29th of March!

WHO'S READY FOR THE YELLOW BRICK WAR? ME ME ME ME ME!

Or actually I'm not, because I don't want anyone to die, I don't want to lose Amy and Nox or anyone else. *thinks of Gert* *Cries*

The first two books were just complete awesomeness; I just love our sassy, pink-haired Amy and I love Oz, although it's corrupted by the poopiehead of a Dorothy. Such a pain in the ass, that woman. I love her.

Amy has become even more badass in the second book and I'm just so excited for what will happen to her and Oz in the third book. It's been a while since I read the books, though, so I can't recall much, but I just love these fairytale-retellings!

This book will be out the 15th of March!

This book is actually already out, but I'm still going to include it in this list, because why the hell not.

Endure by Sara B Larson - I've been waiting for way too long! TOO LONG!

It has been ages since I've read these books, and I'm going to read them all over again and then read this one after that, because it was such a great reading experience.

Basically it's about a girl who has spent quite some time pretending to be a boy in the personal guard of the prince of the world she lives in. She is one of the best soldiers and goes by the name Alex Hollen. It becomes quite difficult to keep up the pretence, especially when she starts to fall for the prince. Meanwhile a lot of dangers are awaiting them.

The sequel to first book ended on such a cliffhanger - it wasn't necessarily exciting or anything, but it was so so so romantic! I ship Alexa (that's her actual name) and Damian (the prince), so so so much, but there is just a lot of stuff happening right now that might stand in the way of their happiness and I'M TERRIFIED!!!

This book came out the 29th of December, 2015.

And I guess that's it for this blog post!

Most books I want to read came out way before, but I just haven't got my hands on them yet.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this blog post!

Until the next blog post, then! :)

A Message To You For 2016

Ahh - just a day till the new year starts!

It's not that special, actually. In the end it's still the next day and nothing will actually change, just the last number of the year.

But the fireworks, the great food and the people just make it special.

Now we all have New Year's resolutions.

"I want to be happy"or "I'm going to study hard in my final year and pass my exams".

All great visions on how great the next year will be. Because this year is going to be YOUR year; this year is going to be perfect; this year, ooh this year, this year is going to be the BEST!

Right?

But when all the festivities are over, reality strucks in like lightning and suddenly life returns to normal. Nothing's changed!

You're still the same person like few hours before and well, your same old life goes on.

And those New Year's resolutions?

Well, they're just resolutions, aren't they?

Now I'm not going to tell you to cling to thes resolutions - make them reality! Hold on! Believe! - no.

Nor will I tell you to give up on them.

The only thing I will tell you is this:

Know that you don't know.

Because if you expect to be this or that, to do these great things this year, it will only hurt more when it doesn't happen, when you realize you're incapable, that you lack skill or motivation etcetera etcetera etcetera...

So don't.

Although it's better not to, we till have the visions. I mean everybody has them!

Everybody feels like doing something!

The only problem most of us face is that we aren't prepared for what's next.

And you can't be prepared for what's next.

But you can be prepared for not being prepared. You can be prepared for not knowing what to do.

The point is:

Next year, when you have this list of things you want to accomplish, be prepared for not accomplishing anything of this list at all! Life's weird!

Everything changes every single time! So how the hell would you know what's going to happen? You don't! Will it be good, will it be bad - YOU NEVER KNOW!

And you have to be at peace with that!

But then, what do you do when you never know what to do?

You just live. You do thigs relevant for this very moment. You think you should do homework now? Do it. You see your room's dirty? Clean it.

What will happen tomorrow, what you will do tomorrow, is and stays in tomorrow and you'll see what's up then.

Not now. Because you can't do anything for tomorrow now.

It's true that your actions might have any effect on tomorrow. Like if you do most of your homework now, you might have to do less tomorrow. But what if you get an email tomorrow saying that you get extra homework? Or your mom gives you extra chores?

There goes your preparation for tomorrow. So you don't have any idea how tomorrow will turn out for you.

To this point you probably feel like "know that you don't know" is the worst advice anyone could ever give to you and it's pointless and idiotic and strange and perhaps a bit scary.

Okay then - let's get back to those resolutions.

What are these resolutions?

They are hopes, some impossible, some quite doable.

But in the end hopes are hopes.

We need hopes.

We do it all the time - it's what keeps us going.

Because if we don't hope, how the hell are we going to enjoy this strange, impossible madness called life?

But Nadi, isn't having hopes pointless when you never know what will happen next and you can't be prepared for anything?

You tell me. Is it? Do you feel better if you don't have hopes? Will you feel motivated to do something? If hopes get pointless, then doesn't life become pointless?

If you ask me: no, hopes are definitely not pointless.

Because it's all we can do for now. We can't look into the future, but having hope can give us all a great boost. It will make us try!

If you keep on hoping, you will keep on trying!

And those who keep on trying are mainly the ones who get where they want to be, and happily!

Yes, some don't - they just had bad luck. Maybe they're badly injured, they lived in abad environment or lacked the skills or were aiming for something impossible. But that's life.

But knowing that you don't know isn't supposed to keep you from living or make you feel down or take away your hope!

It should fuel your hope!

You have no idea what is up ahead, you have no idea how things will turn out, so all you can do is hope and try to make these visions come true.

And that will - hopefully (see what I did there? *wink* *wink*) - get you where you want to be.

So here's my advice to you for 2016, and actually every single moment in your life:

Know that you don't know.

You have no idea what will happen tomorrow or next year or if your dreams will come true.

And you need to accept this.

But don't stop hoping, and with that: DON'T STOP TRYING!

Because in the end all you have to do is:

Hope for the best and be ready for the worst!

Have a wonderful time tonight! Enjoy your New Year's Eve with everyone you love and don't forget to hope!

I wish you all the best for 2016!

Until the next blog post! :)

Glass Sword by Victoria Aveyard!

Since my latest blogpost was a review on Aveyard's Red Queen, I felt obligated to write a blogpost about the sequel of this book, Glass Sword. The book isn't out yet - and it's killing me, LITERALLY killing me - but I do have some thoughts on this book I'd love to share with you guys!

The Story

First up - the story!

Now the story ended almost right after the big plot twist of this book and after the ending my mind kep spinning around possibilities for the next book. And, like that wasn't enough, Aveyard also put this new, and quite important, character in the ending and I was like: WHAAAATTTT. I'm obviously not going to tell you who that is, of course. Hehe.

But I found the first book amazing and I hope that the second one will amaze me just as much as the first one or maybe even more. I'm hoping for more of these amazing plot twists.

I do feel like there's a real war coming up and the battle between the Reds and Silvers is going to be a though one, a revolutionair one. Though it may not really seem like it and both might deny it, this war is more between Mare (and Cal) and Maven than between the Reds and Silvers, which makes me curious how it will turn out.
I have the feeling that Mare is going to be this strong leader who will stand up against Maven and his army, all professional and heroic, and Maven will fight back with full power, but other than that I actually don't have any idea what will happen. Like I said, my mind is spinning around possibilities, and they stay possibilities and not much more. I still have the feeling that Aveyard has another plot twist waiting for us, which makes it difficult for me to have a clear picture of the rest of the story.

All I can do is hope and keep on spinning, I guess.

So I hope that we do get something of the Silvers and not just Mare's hatred against them and against Maven, but something else too, something good, perhaps. Maybe some of them join Mare or she might get some sympathy for them. I just hope that they won't be fully stamped as enemies, because that would make it less interesting and the story much flatter. I like to see some conflicting thoughts about the Silvers, you know, just to spice things up. Knowing Mare's character, I believe that there is a chance that this will happen, although she'll probably deny it at first - it will take time.

And furthermore, the list of Reds with Silver powers both Mare and Maven carry around, how much will that be highlighted? 

I think pretty much, but where does that leave the war, which I think is going to come in the sequel? I'm kind of hoping that this list will bring Mare and Maven together, because I ship them, hardcore. Really hardcore. Maybe they'll be friends again? Or even more?

Maybe Maven changes?

God. So many questions for which I don't have an answer! AVEYARD, YOU ARE KILLING ME!

But I just got to have faith in Aveyard and hope she won't kill me even more with this sequel. And of course that she will write a third sequel. Duh.

The Characters

Ah, the characters! I'm curious about what will happen to them! Who will end up with who? Who will betray who? Who will be added to the story? How will they change the story?

I have no idea who the new characters might be, but I have my guesses. We're probably going to find more Reds with Silver-powers, but I don't think we're going to be introduced to all of them - it would probably make the story messy. But I do hope we're going to see most of them! What will they be like? Will they join Mare or will they decline her and tell her to get the hell out of here? Will they be strong Reds, or fearful like most of the Reds?

Another question that's burning in my head is: Is there going to be a new enemy? Who will betray Mare? (Those are actually two questions, but whatever.) 
Will one of those Reds betray Mare while she's on her way to kill the Silvers?
Will that newly introduced character in the first book betray her? 
I know, I know maybe that's a bit farfetched, if you know who this character is, but hey - from now on I don't trust anyone in that book. 
And are there still some nice Silvers out there? Maybe some sweet grandma's who want to help out and WON'T betray her? Or maybe another hot guy (though hot guys are most likely to betray her - they seem nice, but they always end up to be the bad guy. God. Still want to give it a shot, though.)? Or maybe this cute little kid with big blue eyes or something?
Hopefully.
MAYBE THEY CAN GET US JULIAN JACOS BACK! OR MAYBE JULIAN JUST COMES TO US!
You know, that instructor that helped Mare several times and left for some reason I can't remember. He was nice. Maybe he'll come back with Silvers like him? 
O, God, I miss him so much! #JULIANTHEHEROANDNICESILVERGUY

That brings us automatically to the old cast - how will they develop?
Let's start with the main character: Mare. She is determined to kill Maven, but won't everything that has happened to her ask their toll? She got a lot thrown at her and although she managed to sit it all through, maybe it will hurt her more now. Knowing her character she'll probably try to supress any sad feeling and try to use her past experiences in her advantage, but I'm still curious if it won't find its way to get out of the dark and objective corners of her mind and break her down. She is still a human after all (with badass superpowers). Especially her relationship with Cal - how will that affect both of them? Yes, they share the same hatred for Maven and want to kill him desperately, but how will their relationship influence their determination? Will it make things difficult for them? Or will they find their way back to each other? 
Or will they remain friends and Mare will end up with Maven again? I don't know why I ship Mare and Maven so much, but I just like them together, even though Maven is a *peep*. He still has a heart, right? Or at least he'll obtain one, right? Right?
I still think that there's something in Maven that knows that what he's doing is wrong and if Mare just finds a way to get that something to take control over him, he might change. He is just one of those guys who's darkened by jealousy and his mom, but that doesn't mean that there's no good heart on the inside. I RESIST TO BELIEVE THAT.
Although Cal might not think the same about that. WELL, CAL, YOU JUST SHUT UP, OKAY?
(Just kidding. I love you too.)
I think Cal is going to be the guy who will dive into revenge and will let himself be led by this feeling. He probably won't care to think his steps through when he gets a chance to kill Maven, whether Mare will try to stop him or not. 

But we're still not done with this love-rectangle: What about Kilorn?
Yeah, what about him? Good question! I actually have the feeling he won't be so important in the story as Maven and Cal, since he has been through different stuff which Mare wasn't part of and he doesn't have these strong feelings and problems as Maven and Cal, for as far as I know. He loves Mare - that's obvious - and he'll do anything to protect her, but if he'll be important in this fight? No, probably not. I feel the same way for any other additional characters like Farley or that new character - they will help her, protect her, give her advice every now and then, guide her in a way, but that will be about it.
The fight is mainly - like I said - between Maven, Mare and Cal. They've started it and now they'll end it. Hopefully. Unless someone tries to interfere. 
Things are going to get spicy as hell in this book!

The World

Ah, at last - the world!

I'm excited for what else we're going to see of Northa. What beautiful - or maybe not so beautiful - places are we going to visit? What will be going on in those places? How will those place affect the story?

Since Mare and her friends are fugitives now and they have to make sure they don't get caught by Maven and his army, I think she has to travel to new places. Cool places. Dark places. Historical places. I don't know.

I mean look at this map! Doesn't it look awesome? Don't you too want to see what the rest of the world looks like? Don't you want to see what a fantastic world Aveyard has created?

(I got this map from www.epicreads.com)






Well. That was a loooonnnnggggg blogpost! Sorry, guys, but I just had a lot to say, since I'm so freaking pumped for this sequel! I hope you enjoyed this blogpost - even though it was pretty long - as much as I did writing it. I was mostly grinning while writing, haha.
REAL FANGIRL OVER HERE AND I'M PROUD OF IT.
But well, I'm going to stop fangirling now and pretend I'm this quiet girl. If I can.
Until the next blogpost, then! :)

NOTE: Next week I won't be posting anything on my blog since I'm going on vacation!  

Life - a path to discover

Where will the road of life take you?

"Life isn't about finding yourself,

it's about creating yourself."

- George Bernard Shaw

 This quote inspired today's blogpost. This quote has kind of changed my point of view on life, actually. Simply because it made me adjust my goals, my thoughts, just a little.

We all say that we need to find what we love, that we need to find what's really meant for us and what to do with our lives.

To become a singer, a writer, a doctor, an engineer - whatever you can think of.

Basically we're saying that we're looking for an already laid out path possibly made by faith or God - whatever you believe in - to follow and meanwhile hoping that our true selves will come to us naturally. We are already gifted with quite some qualities from our parents so we kind of have an idea of who we are and the rest will just come when the time is right. We believe that once we've found it, we'll know.

Nice thought, but lets get back to reality.

Because in reality this is not how it works, how hard you may believe in it. In reality you start out with a blank canvas. Yes, you may have inherited quite some qualities from your parents, but with those qualities you're never able to say how you will turn out as a person. They don't decide what you love and are capable of - they can't tell what you should be looking for and what you want. Only you can.
But sometimes you do follow these thoughts, because people make these boundaries for you, judging by your origin or gender or your parents - most times your parents themselves do this, other times other people. But if you keep on thinking this way, you won't ever find what you're looking for. You won't be yourself, whoever that may be.

Now don't get me wrong - these people might now what they're talking about. They've probably walked around this world for quite some time and in that time they've made quite some mistakes and they've learned from them. They want to protect you and guide you and that's okay. But you can't let them do the living for you.
You can't let this influence your judgement - you can't always let them decide what's best for you. You can't let them create you.
One day you have to step out of that box and walk the road of life on your own.
One day you have to start to create. On your own.

We're all unique - every set of genes is different in maybe the tiniest or the biggest ways, but some of these genes might come from your father or mother specifically. Your sibling can have some of these genes too. So, yes, you might have something in common.
But since there are also differences - big or small.
Therefore, once again, we're unique.
But having something common isn't always inside the family. Sometimes it's outside it.
Sometimes you may find that someone is so much like you or you're so much like someone else. Is your uniqueness fading away? Would it be better to live in that box again? Do people have the right to make boundaries for you? Are you already living by them?
No. 
As soon as you step out of that box and walk down the road of life on your own, you're going to meet so many different people and you will definitely take some bits and pieces of those people. Whether they make you a better you or a worse you.
You're copying. And that doesn't have to be a bad thing, because most times you gradually start to do something else.
You're starting to create. You're putting colour on that blank canvas of yours. And sometimes other paintings might have been created by the same brushes and colours.
But they're not the same.

So tell me, how are you going to find something or someone that isn't there yet? That is yet to be created?

There's no finding yourself, because there's nothing to find - there's only to discover.

You'll discover so many things that you might hate or love and this makes you you. You'll never be prepared for what will come after the next turn on the road. Maybe you're going to like this part, maybe it's awful, maybe it's so empty that it bores you. 
You create an opinion, you create taste, you create hobbies and yes, this might be the same as your parents or somebody else, but still: you decided it should be yours, too.
You discovered that you felt the same way about it.

Because we're always discovering these new things and because we're always copying people and making those copies our own, we change a lot throughout life. 
The boy or girl you were when you were four is possibly different from who you are now. The man or woman who's yet to come can also be someone completely different from who you are now. Because in those moments we thought we should be that person, that version of ourselves, because it seemed right back then. In those moments we had this taste and this opinion. Like for example: when I was younger I really loved the colour pink and later on I started to hate it and right now I embrace every single colour - all of them have some kind of beauty, though I do have my favorites. And why did my opinion change? Because I decided I agreed with other opinions, I decided that I wasn't going to to be picky and miss out on the beauty of every colour (even though some colours are more beautiful than others).
And how tiny and unnecessary this change may seem, it does prove that you don't stick to one opinion. You don't stick to one you. You always, always, change into a different you.
You're always creating.

What I'm basically trying to say is: life is a path to discover. An already laid out path only exists in the minds of the others, but not in yours. If you're going to look for that path, for yourself, for something, you won't find it, not even by asking the others. 
You're going to search for a path, for something, for someone that isn't there and isn't going to be there, not even at the end of the road. Your canvas will turn blank, even if you pour colours on it.

But by discovering and copying you can shine some light on that dark path and put some colour on your canvas that will stay.
You can create.
And then, only then, you'll figure out what will be at the end of the road. Even though you change as a person you don't become someone else - if you do then you did something wrong in the creating-process. There is always a part of you - big or small - that remains. A part that you once created and fell in love with and relied upon. Your heart, your inner guide - your true self.
So stop looking for something, for yourself and go, create that something, create yourself! 

P.S. So! That was eh... inspiring? Deep? Weird, perhaps?

Sometimes I'm surprised by what I have to say, sometimes even ashamed... I even find it scary to put out some of my thoughts on the internet for everyone to see, but then I remind myself of the fact that it's just a thought. Not everyone will agree, but some might need it. And maybe I need it.
But I'm NO professional, I don't know much about life (I'm still a teenager, hehe...), but I just thought I'd share this thought with you. Maybe you can do something with it - I don't know.
Until the next blogpost, then! :) 

The Paper Towns Movie!

THE PAPER TOWNS MOVIE IS SO CLOSE! I really loved the book Paper Towns by John Green, so I'm really pumped for the movie. And since the movie is coming out next week I thought I'd share my thoughts on the movie with you guys. 

The Cast

First things first - the cast.

I think the cast is pretty close to what I had imagined the cast to be like. When I first read the book I immediately pictured Cara Delevingne as Margo and someone comparable to Justice Smiths for Radar. I also find that Halston Sage is very very much alike to how I had pictured Lacey and so is Jaz Sinclair for Angela. As for Ben and Quentin - Q - I actually had pictured something different from Austin Abrams or Nat Wolff. I pictured Ben a lot more tanned and bigger than Austin - not trying to be offending. As for Q, I thought he would be a lot tinier and paler - again not trying to be offending. But I actually don't mind the cast the way it is. I mean it would be a miracle to find the perfect people who are exactly like how I had imagined them to be.

The Story

Naturally, when a book becomes a movie, there are some changes in the story to make it fit in one movie of like two hours or so and, of course, to make it better. I mean, as much as I enjoyed this book, I'd rather not watch a movie of four hours long with literally every scene of the book in it. But I'm kind of curious what kind of effect these changes will have. I heard that Angela will be on the road trip with Q, Ben, Radar and Lacey, which actually sounds like a fun change in the story. I don't think she'll really be an addition that will or ruin the story or change this part of it that much. It does make me wonder if Angela gets a bigger role in the story, like will she help Q and his friends with finding Margo? Or will she - just like Lacey - will be involved only then a bit more on the background? 
I'm pretty sure that the emphasis will be put on the search for Margo, because that's what the book mostly is about. But the big, burning question in my mind is how this search will turn out in the movie. I personally think that the search is more about Q finding Margo and by that I don't necessarily mean physically but I mainly mean finding the real Margo. In the search he discovers a lot about Margo he didn't know about before and it feels like he actually never knew her until then. The rest, actually, is more to make the story more fun and exciting. And the other characters don't have this strong need to figure out the real Margo - they either just want to help Q or they just want to find her.
So what I'm basically trying to say is that the emphasis should be put on Q finding Margo, but since that would actually turn out to be boring if we're only going to get to see Q who's desperately trying to find out who Margo is. I'll probably fall asleep just like my dad, although he always falls asleep when we're watching a movie that I like :/. 
So I think that the emphasis will be put on how Q and his friends are trying to figure out the clues that Margo left and what struggles they have with each other (for example, the fight between Ben and Q) and the search and the roadtrip. I'm really excited for the roadtrip - I think I'm going to pee my pants from laughing so hard. And I actually want the rest of the characters to play a big role in the movie, because I need Ben in the movie. I. LOVE. BEN. EVERYBODY SHOULD LOVE BEN! He always makes me laugh and nearly pee my pants, even though peeing your pants isn't so fun... Ben is the character who makes everything less serious and more fun. Without him I'm pretty sure the story would suck. (Maybe not.)

Tiny Details

I really really really hope that they keep a lot of the tiny details in the movie. For example the obsession that Radar's parents have for black santa's should definitely stay in - don't ask me why, just do it - and RHAPAW! THEY MUST CALL BEN'S CAR RHAPAW.

Or the story that Margo wrote about her and Q is so cute and fun, that it must stay. But I don't want Margo to chop off her hair, they can leave that out.

I always like it when the tiny details in the story come back in the movie, so I'll probably be whining about the movie the whole time if that one tiny detail I wanted to (or didn't want to) be in the movie isn't there. Do you guys have any tiny details that definitely should or shouldn't be in the movie?

Overall, I just hope that the movie stays close to the book and is a good visualization of the story. But I'm pretty sure that - even though I don't know all these actors - these actors have done a great job in the movie and will be a good reflection of the characters in the book. We'll figure it out next week! Ahh, I'm SO excited!!!

Until the next blogpost! :)

Both pictures are from: @papertownsmovie on Instagram